15-17 Drink water from your own cistern, flowing water from your own well. Should your springs be scattered abroad, streams of water in the streets? Let them be for yourself alone, and not for strangers with you.

18-20 Let your fountain be blessed, and rejoice in the wife of your youth, a lovely deer, a graceful doe. Let her breasts fill you at all times with delight; be intoxicated always in her love. Why should you be intoxicated, my son, with a foreign woman and embrace the bosom of an adulteress?

21 For a man's ways are before the eyes of the Lord, and he ponders all his paths. 22 The iniquities of the wicked ensnare him, and he is held fast in the cords of his sin. 23 He dies for lack of discipline, and because of his great folly he is led astray. Proverbs 5:15-23 English Standard Version

Would you drink muddy water? Or, if you lived long before water was piped to homes but had a lovely well on your property, would you want the water to be wasted and sloshed on the village streets? The obvious answer for both questions would be 'definitely not!'. In a similar way the father here was urging his son to treat marriage with the same care. He uses the picture of ‘wells’ and ‘streams’ in vs 15-17 to illustrate his point. It was a discreet way of talking about the marriage bed. The New Testament book of Hebrews says: “Let marriage be held in honour among all - and let the marriage bed be undefiled - because God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous.” Hebrews 13:4.

So what was his advice to his son in vs 18-20 about the marriage relationship?

We see that the Bible does not teach that the physical side of marriage is something dirty or unholy. He used the words 'delight' and 'intoxicated' as he spoke of it. But what is dirty and unholy is when a married man enters that sort of relationship with 'a foreign woman'. This doesn't mean foreign in the sense of another nationality, but foreign in that she is not his natural wife. (The same would obviously apply to a woman too – she was not to 'be intoxicated' with the advances of a man who wasn’t her husband.)

What reasons does he give in vs 21-23 for why his son must never muddy the pure waters of marriage?

The first reason is that God sees every step we take in life's journey. Much adultery happens in secret – hidden from the eyes of others, but not from God. And He is the one to whom we must eventually give an account for all our choices in life.

A second reason is that wickedness inevitably traps people in a strong grip. (vs 22) Many people think they can break free of wrong doing when they want to – but sadly discover it's not so easy. There's a verse in Proverbs 9 where it says “stolen water is sweet”. So even though adultery is muddy water, it will often taste sweet to the ones involved, and very hard to give up.

The third reason the father gives his son is that the lack of self control and accepting foolish values leads a person astray. (vs 23) When people are intoxicated by immorality they lose all sense of moral direction. If Christians get into adultery (which sadly does happen) or get caught up in other immoral activities, they may 'still go to Church' – but they've wandered far off the narrow way that leads to life. They need to repent with all their heart and cry out to God to set them truly free from the snare that has trapped them.

Now while all this was speaking to those who are married – it's just as applicable to others, even those who are still young. Psalm 119:9 asks: “How can a young person stay on the path of purity?” Verse 10 gives the answer: “By living according to God's word”, and adds a prayer: “I seek You with all my heart; don't let me stray from Your commands.”