13-15 “If any man takes a wife and goes in to her, and then scorns and hates her, and charges her (without cause) with shameful behaviour and publicly defames her, and says, ‘I took this woman, but when I approached her, I did not find in her evidence of virginity,’  then the young woman’s father and her mother shall get and bring out the evidence of her virginity to the elders of the city at the gate (where court is held). 

16-19 The father of the young woman shall say to the elders, ‘I gave my daughter to this man as a wife, but he hates her and has turned against her; and behold, he has made baseless charges against her, saying, “I did not find in your daughter the evidence of her virginity.” But this is the evidence of my daughter’s virginity.’ And they shall spread out the garment before the elders of the city.  Then the elders of that city shall take the man and reprimand him, and they shall fine him a hundred shekels of silver and give it to the father of the young woman, because he publicly defamed a virgin of Israel. And she shall remain his wife; he is not allowed to divorce her as long as he lives.

20-21 “But if this charge is true that the evidence of virginity was not found in the young woman, then they shall bring her out to the doorway of her father’s house, and the men of her city shall stone her to death because she has committed a deliberate sin in Israel by playing the prostitute in her father’s house. So you shall remove the evil from among you. Deuteronomy 22:13-21 Amplified Bible.

The Bible isn’t silent on the subject of sexual relations. Genesis 2:25 tells us that when Eve was joined to Adam as his wife they “were both naked, but they were not ashamed.” And in Chapter 4:1 it says: “Adam  had relations with his wife Eve, and she conceived and gave birth to Cain.” So, apart from being a bond between husband and wife, sex was also the way in which God's world would be populated. Sadly, the first act of disobedience that separated Adam and Eve from God opened the door to the spoiling of other good things God had given, including sexual relationships. That's what Moses was having to deal with in today's portion. In what two ways had this spoiling of sexual relations affected the marriage described in vs 13-15?

It seems 'the act' had not lived up to expectations and had led to bitterness. That in turn had led to false accusations. Moses goes on in vs 16-19 to explain how the false accusation could be answered by the father presenting the garment or cloth from the wedding night as evidence of his daughter's virginity. Verses 20-21, however, underline the seriousness in which God viewed the matter if there had been promiscuity. There are some lessons here for our sex-saturated generation!

Firstly, sexual relationships were intended by God to be between a man and a woman in the bond of marriage. The Bible uses words like fornication, adultery and homosexuality to describe sexual relationships outside of marriage. They are acts that God told His people to never do.

Secondly, sex is not meant to be the big focus of our life. If it is our 'focus' it will distort our expectations, and also the way we will respond if things happen (such as illness) that affect the physical side of marriage. There's a tragic story in 2 Samuel 13 of a man named Amnon who thought he was 'in love' with a woman named Tamar, and raped her. But we read that, after the deed “Amnon hated her with intense hatred. In fact, he hated her more than he had loved her.” That's what happens when lust is mistaken for love. It's the reason why pornography is so evil and will never help a marriage. It stirs up lust – it doesn't focus on love.

Thirdly, the current trend of having many sexual encounters, or sleeping around, is against all that God's word teaches. It's a trend that existed from way back in time, but has become more and more 'acceptable' in society through being glamourized in novels and movies, and by so-called 'celebrities'. But the apostle Paul wrote: “Don’t fool yourselves. Those who indulge in sexual sin, commit adultery, are male prostitutes or practice homosexuality - none of these will inherit the Kingdom of God.” (1 Corinthians 6:9-10) May God help us in our generation to uphold what His word teaches about sexual purity, both in our teaching and in our personal conduct.