17 A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for a time of adversity. 18 One who has no sense shakes hands in pledge and puts up security for a neighbour. 19 Whoever loves a quarrel loves sin; whoever builds a high gate invites destruction. 20 One whose heart is corrupt does not prosper; one whose tongue is perverse falls into trouble. 21 To have a fool for a child brings grief; there is no joy for the parent of a godless fool. 22 A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.

23-24 The wicked accept bribes in secret to pervert the course of justice. A discerning person keeps wisdom in view, but a fool’s eyes wander to the ends of the earth. 25 A foolish son brings grief to his father and bitterness to the mother who bore him. 26 If imposing a fine on the innocent is not good, surely to flog honest officials is not right.

27-28  The one who has knowledge uses words with restraint, and whoever has understanding is even-tempered. Even fools are thought wise if they keep silent, and discerning if they hold their tongues. Proverbs 17:17-28 New International Version

Once again it's a mixed collection of thoughts but I noticed that the writer twice mentions the great sorrow of God fearing parents when their children behave like fools. (vs 21 & 25) Parents know they are not perfect, but many have grown wiser through the years and one their hopes is that their children will not do some of the foolish things that they did when they were young.

While verse 17 speaks of the goodness of being the sort of person that others can turn to when they need help, verse 18 warns of the danger of being gullible! Verse 19 describes those who are argumentative and stingy, and verse 20 speaks of people whose hearts are given over to doing wrong and whose words can never be trusted. One can see how those who choose the foolish options listed there would cause their parents much grief. While vs 22 is true of life in general, it can certainly apply to parents. Their children can cheer their hearts or crush their spirits.

Verses 23-24 are further examples of wicked choices people make instead of wise ones. When people are greedy they fall for bribes and dishonesty triumphs over justice. Verse 26 is like what happens today when honest people in society have their reputations ruined by greedy liars. God fearing parents could never be proud of such a son or daughter no matter how 'successful' in the world they became.

So what is the lesson of verses 27-28?

Once again it boils down to our words. Wise people think before they speak and choose their words carefully so as not to start arguments. Foolish ones rush in and cause chaos. And if taking care with our words is good advice in our dealings with people, how much more when we come before God. In Chapter 5 vs 1-3 of the Old Testament book called Ecclesiastes it says: “Be careful about going to the Temple. It's better to go there to learn than to offer sacrifices like foolish people who don't know right from wrong. Think before you speak, and don't make any rash promises to God. He is in heaven and you are on earth, so don't say any more than you have to. The more you worry, the more likely you are to have bad dreams, and the more you talk, the more likely you are to say something foolish.” (Good News Translation)

If our parents are still alive, what is our relationship with them like? Are we a cause for joy or sorrow to them? And if they've passed away, is there anything we are aware of in the past which we need to ask God forgiveness for? If we are parents ourselves, ask God to make us the sort of parents who will be there for our children in times of adversity. And pray much that God will help them to see more and more the treasure of knowing Christ, and give them the wisdom to make right choices in life.