Day 264: Appearances can be deceptive – Proverbs 14 vs 8 - 14

8 The wisdom of the wise man is to understand what to do, but lying is the foolish way of fools. 9 Fools laugh at sin, but the favour of God is among the faithful. 10 The heart knows when it is bitter, and a stranger cannot share its joy. 11 The house of the sinful will be destroyed, but all will go well in the tent of the faithful. 12 There is a way which looks right to a man, but its end is the way of death. 13 Even while laughing the heart may be in pain, and the end of joy may be sorrow. 14 The man who has gone back into sin will get the fruit of his ways, and a good man will get the fruit of what he does. Proverbs 14:8-14 New Life Version (English Standard Version link)

I wonder if, like me, you quickly identified with vs 13 which said: “Even while laughing the heart may be in pain, and the end of joy may be sorrow.” Are there not times when we put on the appearance of happiness when there may be deep sorrow inside? There are also times when something joyful can leave a bitter taste in the end. This has sadly been true of many marriages. While the circumstances that turn joy into sorrow are often out of our control, do you think vs 12 could possibly be a reason why some things don't end up the way we hoped?

Things are not always what we thought they were, and appearances can be deceptive. It's a pity we often only come to realize that when we are older and due to personal experience of terrible disappointment. But that's why the writer wanted to teach these things to a younger generation so that they don't make their choices on appearances. This is not just about marriage and the good looks of a prospective wife or husband. It's all of life. Friends we choose to hang out with, the career we seek, where we choose to live – all of these are often based on appearance rather than careful thought and prayer and wanting what God most wants for us.

What if we did that? What if we were more careful and prayerful about the things we choose, and really sought God's way rather than our own? Do you think the second part of vs 14 would follow in our lives?

That verse doesn't guarantee life won't have its twists and turns and that we will never have illness, job losses or personal tragedies. None of us can fully know the pains (or the joys) even some Christians have gone through.(See vs 10) But the verse does teach that, just as backsliding leads to sorrow, so faithfulness leads to a life that is more fruitful. Verse 11 puts it even more bluntly. Can you see how appearances in that verse can also be deceptive?

The writer pictures some people living in the sturdy structure of a house. But sinful living destroys it. (In a figurative way) The other people were living in a tent. On the outside that didn't look so grand and secure as the house. But their faithfulness to God resulted in a blessed home. Verse 8-9 highlight the different attitudes of those who choose God's wisdom and those who foolishly look on the superficial attractions of the world. Foolish people mock thoughts about sin and have no problem lying their way through life. That looked like the best way to make progress in the world to them. But it's those who are faithful to God who find His favour and they have a better understanding of what leads to real joy.

While the words of vs 12 are important even for those who love Christ – they are especially important for those who don't. There is a way which looks right to a man, but its end is the way of death. There's a lifestyle that may look right in their eyes. Popularity, success, wealth, multiple partners – may all appear to offer the most promising rewards. But when they keep the man or women from Christ, they are only leading to death and eternal separation from God. There's also a religion that may look right in a person's eyes. A religion that’s all about 'feeling good' about oneself and no thoughts of sin and repentance – religion that is all about robes, and rituals and impressive buildings, but no life changing relationship with Jesus Christ – that too is a way that ends in death. Jesus said “I am the way, the truth and the life – no one comes to the Father except through me” (John 14:6) That's the way we need to choose.