Day 677: Faithful friends - Proverbs 27 vs 3 - 11

3-4 A stone is heavy, and sand is weighty, but a fool's provocation is heavier than both. Wrath is cruel, anger is overwhelming, but who can stand before jealousy? 5-6 Better is open rebuke than hidden love. Faithful are the wounds of a friend; profuse are the kisses of an enemy.

7 One who is full loathes honey, but to one who is hungry everything bitter is sweet. 8 Like a bird that strays from its nest is a man who strays from his home.

9 Oil and perfume make the heart glad, and the sweetness of a friend comes from his earnest counsel. 10 Do not forsake your friend and your father's friend, and do not go to your brother's house in the day of your calamity. Better is a neighbour who is near than a brother who is far away. 11 Be wise, my son, and make my heart glad, that I may answer him who reproaches me. Proverbs 27:3-11 English Standard Version

Verse 11 reminds us why the book of Proverbs was written. A father was seeking to pass on to his son a wisdom that would guide him to a life that brings no shame. What dangers does he warn about in vs 3-4?

He wants his son to know that life is likely to have some heavy burdens along the way, and two of the heaviest will be dealing with people who are full of nonsense and very jealous. Cruelty and anger are bad, but sometimes they are outbursts. Foolish and jealous people usually keep at it. It's wiser to not make friends of such people. What do vs 5-6 teach about the sort of friends that are better in life?

The Good News Bible translates vs 5 as saying it's “better to correct someone openly than to let him think you don't care for him at all”. There are times when all of us need to be told of something in our character or behaviour that is harmful rather than helpful. But it takes a faithful friend to be brave enough to tell us that. Being told off by a friend will do us far more good than false flattery from people who secretly despise us. Can you see how vs 9 emphasizes that truth?

Friends who mean us well, and are willing to speak earnestly to us about things we need to hear, are as refreshing to our spirit as perfumes and oils are to our bodies. So what does the father urge his son to do with regard to faithful friends as he goes through life? (vs 10)

He encourages him to show great loyalty to friends. Not only to his own friends, but even to people that he knows were faithful friends of his father and the family. We’ve an amazing example of this in the life of King David. After he became king, following the death of Saul, we read that one day he asked, “Is there anyone left of Saul's family? If there is, I would like to show him kindness for Jonathan's sake.” (2 Samuel 9:1) His friendship with Saul's son Jonathan had been so strong that after Jonathan died in battle he wanted to do all he could for any family that was left.

Verse 10 teaches that there are times when friends will be of more help than even family. Some family members may ‘feel obliged' to help us if we are in trouble, but a friend would do so out of love. Our friends will also often be closer at hand than family. Earlier in Proverbs the writer said: “A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.” (Proverbs 18:24) Such a friend is precious. Is it not wonderful then that Jesus calls believers his friends! And is He not that perfect friend who is closer than a brother!

Verse 7 says that people who are full look down on what others would consider a real treat. In a similar way, people who are full of themselves will often look down on things such as faithful friendships. In fact, as vs 8 indicates, they may even walk out on families. Think of the prodigal son Jesus spoke of. May God help us to be friends who are faithful. May we be truthful at all times, and ready to help when we can.